I don't know why, but I seem to have picked up an unnatural fascination with lard.
It may have something to do with a fun party game I used to play. It's very simple. You and all your guests just sing songs that you know with love in the title, replacing the word 'love' with the word 'lard'. Go ahead and try it.
My personal favourites: "Lard Is A Many-Splendoured Thing", "The Power Of Lard", "All You Need Is Lard"... the list goes on.
Anyway, back to my husband
Do I look any further than this?