Sorely tested.

Yesterday, I got a call in the morning from a nice lady from the automotive inspection company. She told me in a few short words that the nice inspector man was at the address they were given, but there was no sign of the Mysterious Internet Seller Assface.

Fuck! He's skipped off to the Bahamas with my $1375! Assface!

I called the M.I.A, but could only leave a message. I called the 1-800-GIVETOCHARITY number on the item listing, and got a dude who didn't know what I was talking about, and after a brief chat revealed that he was just a human answering service for M.I.A. Needless to say, I left messages from here to Timbuktu, then considered I should check on the money itself.

I called the charity that I believed I sent my check to, to see if they'd received it. The National Charity Support Foundation chap said he'd never heard of me, or the M.I.A., or the VIN of my car. Fucking ACE. (I let him know that I'd call back if I did actually discover that M.I.A. was a SHARK.)

Called the bank.

Many automated steps and hold music eventually informed me that the check (that's as good as cash) had been deposited last Friday. Assface! He did take the money. Dude?! Where's my car?

Looked around eBay for some way to COMPLAIN THE HELL OUT OF THE ASSFACE. I wasn't quite ready to leave Negative Feedback about him, since I didn't truly have the facts straight, but thought I could at least get the HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME ball rolling. Discovered you have to wait at least 10 days from the date of the auction before you can COMPLAIN.

Thought I should try to email M.I.A. via eBay (the only remaining conduit), expressing my concern.

He got back to me via email in about 5 minutes. Called him. Talked about the inspection people. Rescheduled.

Baby
I know you're asking me to stay
Say please, please, please, don't go away
etc